A former “friend” told me he cared for me & wanted me to have everything I needed… but that it was time I realize I’m a net negative in society.
He referenced my “free surgeries”, countless ER trips & how the system was artificially extending my life.
He said he had given this a lot of thought, but that he realized he was sick and tired of his taxes supporting people who can’t contribute economically.
That wanting me to have good care was hypocritical since he doesn’t support handouts on “principle”
He said sorry. He said he knew he was being hurtful. But he felt I lacked the ability to understand where he & people like him were coming from
That it doesn’t matter what I contributed in the past or what I contribute in the future, no one has a “right” to be a drain on others
He said that people like me are the reason people like him can’t get ahead.
That he never consented to providing hand outs to disabled or poor people.
That he doesn’t feel his tax dollars should be spent this way.
Shocked and hurt, I asked if he felt I should just die?
He said of course not, but that was his emotions and love for me getting in the way of common sense.
That while he would never advocate killing others, we shouldn’t have our lives “artificially extended”
He felt that by providing healthcare and/or the bare minimum in social supports, society is going against nature.
It’s prolonging the lives of those who would have died at any other point in our history.
“Survival of the fittest”
But here’s the thing, that’s not what survival of the fittest means. It’s not what it ever meant.
Survival of the fittest refers to those with the capacity to adapt.
Not those who are the strongest or the most healthy.
My friend can’t adapt. The only way he can survive is by punching down on others.
Any perceived failings in his own life are the direct fault of someone less fortunate than him.
That’s not “fit”…
It’s denial.
Disabled people like me have an incredible ability to adapt
I’ve had to overcome so much in my life, including trying to survive nearly 6 years of a global pandemic where most of society has opted to leave me by the wayside.
I’m a fighter. We all are.
This is ableism at its most ugly. This is a person who’s embraced eugenics whole heartedly and yet somehow manages to convince themselves they’re noble and “strong”.
He firmly believes he’s better than someone like me, despite having lost his moral compass ages ago
We can and must be better than this. We must call out this behaviour whenever it happens, because it causes untold amounts of damage.
We all have worth. We all have value. No one is expendable.
As soon as we allow people to debate the worth of other’s within society, we’ve lost.
We must work together to ensure our most vulnerable are taken care of, because in doing so we build a safer and more inclusive society for everyone.
This conversation inspired me to write an article about why we undervalue the lives of disabled people.
My “friend” may have been unique in his bluntness, but many people think this way.
They vote for it. They support it. We deserve better:
https://www.disabledginger.com/p/why-do-we-undervalue-the-lives-of
