1
Discussion
Loading...
Post
Eris was the most badass and cool person I ever met. She one day just showed up in the hackspace and later that same day we ended up cuddling on the couch. And from that day on we were friends.
She was the most cat catgirl I've ever known, and that sais a lot, from jumping from couch to couch in the hackspace to always wearing her cat ears (and doing DIY research on getting permanent cat ears, including talking to actual like biotech researchers about how to do that), and also just. being really cuddly sometimes.
Idk if i ever told her but I kinda always admired her. And I certainly miss her now. I miss cuddling her, discussing with her about random bullshit even though our opinions clash due to our completely different opinions, kissing her and making out with her, listening to her infodumps and her adorable cat noises, and hell, just looking at her.
One day after Easterhegg 2025, she ended her own life. On the 22. of april 2025.
A few days later, I was informed of her death while visiting the hackspace before going to watch I Saw the TV Glow with a friend, and after the movie ended, we went outside and I broke down in its arms.
#TDoR #TransDayOfRememberance #TransDayOfRemembrance #TransRights
1
The other is polygon. I... dont even know what to say. I never felt as emotionally close with anyone else as I did with it, not even close.
As I started writing this post I just started crying again. Not as intensely as the day as I tabbed back into my messenger tab where a friend (depressingly, the same that informed me about Eris' passing before going to that movie) informed me about its death. I broke down crying immediately, even though the last time we interacted was Eris funeral.
Honestly, I really don't know what to say. I never loved anyone as much as I loved it, and I realized that way too late. I mostly just broke down crying later toward the end of our relationship.
A few months later, in january, we randomly texted and it decided to come visit me. We both wondered whether that's a good idea, what the feelings situation between us is and then it arrived. Up at the bridge thing at hamburg central station, on the other side from the McDonalds, we fell into eachothers arms and just hugged for almost a minute. Then we tried to figure out how to get some stuff it needed and get to my place. But yep, we still loved eachother. And a day later our relationship was unstable as ever.
And yet I miss it so, so, so fucking much.
I dont know what to talk about because there's so much. I could keep talkin for hours, fill countless posts far beyond the character limit.
On the 26th of June 2025, it endet its life. A few days later I was informed, along with the rest of the world and just. broke.
I do not have the capacity to say much more, so just have some pictures of one of the most wonderful entities I've ever known (some with me, some random excerpts of our time together. read the alt texts, please).
Here's poly's "official" memorial site: https://farewell-polygon.carrd.co
#TDoR #TransDayOfRememberance #TransDayOfRemembrance #TransRights #FarewellPolygon
Two sharks, a normal smolhaj and a pink smolhaj. The normal smolhaj is poly's and her name is miru. After polys death, I adopted her and I'm cuddling her as I'm typing this. The other shark is my shark, lizzie, whom i am also hugging rn. The train window they're looking out of belongs to a stadler KISS of the line RE8, specifically the bicycle compartment, we were travelling from my old home where poly was visiting me to go to the hackspace together when we took that photo. Miru is currently being pet, likely by poly but I'm not 100% sure because only the hand and very little hair is visible.
A frog-perspective photo of poly looking down on the camera and doing the pleading hands. It was trying out my e.s. motion ten pants and easterhegg hoodie, both of which it loved and didn't voluntarily stop wearing daily for weeks to come, the hoodie i only got back a LOT later. This photo was taken in the place we briefly lived together, provided by a friend who was moving out of there.
Me taking a mirror selfie with poly who is smiling cutely into the camera in a hotel room. We were about to go on our way to the first day of Easterhegg 2024 together, just got ready and I jokingly suggested to take some cute couple selfies. It's wearing glasses in this picture, a shirt with flowers and birds and a collar with hanging down decorative chains. We're both wearing skirts, I gifted the one I was wearing in the picture to it later. We also both have only 37c3 wristbands, as that was the event around the time we properly like, got to know eachother.
Me and poly sitting on a bench on the upper floor of a historical double decker tram. I'm holding poly in my arms, it's cuddled up to me and half-laying in my lap and we're both smiling. That day was one of the last few days where I felt like our relationship was still properly functional, and those few hours with it and a few other people (of whom I since grew to love two a lot as well) are one of my most treasured memories, ever.
1
Honestly, I don't know how to end this. I could say so, so much more about both of them.
I cried a lot while writing this. Probably will go to sleep after posting, so I don't miss the vigil later. Writing this at 04:41, and didn't even post anything yet.
I hope I don't have more people to post about next year.
Good night,
trans rights!
(Sending trans rights as/after a goodnight message is a habit I actually got from poly (indirectly), and I don't intend to ever stop doing it.)
#TDoR #TransDayOfRememberance #TransDayOfRemembrance #TransRights
Kakapo Social
Automatic federation enabled